Life and Other Things

Dreams, Failures, and Other Things

I have always been a dreamer.

Over the past year, I’ve taken a break from writing because I was focusing so hard on making my dreams come true.

But sometimes, life doesn’t happen the way you wanted it to. The way you dreamed it would.

And sometimes, that is the greatest blessing of all.

So here’s a few things you need to know about what I’ve been up to over the past year:

  • I graduated from college!!! (YAY!)
  • I applied for my dream job
  • I didn’t get it

If you know me, you know that it was my dream to go back to Disney. I had my heart set on being a Disney professional intern for years. From the moment I left in 2014, all I could think about was going back. Every decision I made was made with the intention of getting me closer and closer to that dream.

I worked for years getting the right experience, references, perfecting my resume. I spent hours critiquing my writing samples, my portfolio, everything. I truly believed that I was made for this position and nothing would stop me from getting it.

I had a few different interviews for a few different positions, I made it through multiple rounds, but in the end – I didn’t get it.

I was devastated. It felt like everything I had worked for, every hour I spent in college was wasted. This was what I wanted, nothing more, nothing less. And suddenly, it was gone.

—–

Around the same time I started applying for the Disney internships, I started dating a sweet boy named Jake. I told him from the beginning that I was planning to move to Florida, and even knowing that – we ended up falling in love.

Jake was so supportive during the entire process. He encouraged me with every step, he believed in me – he never even mentioned me staying because he knew my heart was set on leaving. We didn’t know what this would mean for us, but he didn’t care. He wanted me to be happy.

When I didn’t get the internship, I was devastated. But I wasn’t broken. And I think that’s all because of Jake.

Not moving meant that I got to stay with him, and maybe I’ll never know why I didn’t get the internship when I worked so hard for it – but a part of me believes that it was because I was meant to be here, with Jake.

—–

After I didn’t get the Disney internship, I had to rework my entire life. My five year plan was based on me moving, working there – I didn’t have a plan B. I didn’t have a backup. I didn’t have a job lined up after graduation because I didn’t think I’d need one.

So I settled in and began applying to every job in Baltimore that was even remotely related to my field – and I kept turning up empty. I applied, interviewed, made it through a few rounds, and still couldn’t get hired.

At this point, I was so discouraged. I didn’t feel like there was anywhere I belonged.

But eventually, everything fell into place. I started working for the radio station, which came with some incredibly cool perks.

I moved into a beautiful apartment with my love and we are happier than ever.

I got hired at my (new) dream job. Even though it isn’t Disney, I am happy here. Something I never thought I would be able to say.

I finally found a place where I feel like I belong. All of the pain, heartbreak and disappointment over the past few months led me here. To this picture-perfect life that I love.

—–

There’s a quote that I found when I was struggling with my failures this year, and I would like to leave you with this:

Sometimes not getting what you want is a wonderful stroke of luck.

Everything I have is a result of my “failure” and I have never been happier or more full of love than I am right now.

Remember this, when you’re feeling sad or hopeless or discouraged. The universe has a plan in motion. Everything will come together. Everything will make sense. You just have to hold on to see it.

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