How Long To Stare at Art To Make People Think You’re An Intellectual

Ways To Leave A Party Early Without Saying Goodbye To Anyone

How To Look Like You Weren’t Crying Two Minutes Ago

You Can Stop Referring To Her As ‘Your Ex’ Now Because I’ve Already Found Her Online And Know Her Full Name: A Love Story

How To Wait Until The Last Possible Second To Do Anything

How I Successfully Manage To Avoid Revealing Anything Personal About Myself In Regular Conversation

Why Am I Always Panicked? A Guide to Panicking Over Everything

A Reflection On What That One Girl Said To Me In Sixth Grade

A Guide to Having An Existential Crisis in Public

Why We Should Just Stop Exploring The Sea Because It Freaks Me Out If I Think About It For Too Long

Songs I Can’t Listen To Because They Remind Me Of Specific People

How To Make 17 Dollars Last Two Weeks Straight

Accidentally Sending a Text To The Person You Were Talking About

Unproductive Habits To Develop While Avoiding Writing On A Regular Basis

3 thoughts on “Things I am Qualified to Write About

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